Happy Independence Day!

Welcome to a special 4th of July edition of Armageddon Wednesday, in which we discuss the tiny little firecracker with the power to blow up the Earth, the Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator, not to be confused with the now defunct Uranium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator, or the completely nonexistent Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator. Now, it's important that on this day of celebration we do not inadvertently destroy the planet, so please, do not light off an Illudium PU-36. If you are having trouble differentiating between the Illudium and your average firecracker, look for the following directions - "Place on flat surface, light wick, and get 35 million miles away." Simply place the Modulator in your pocket, and light yourself a sparkler. We'll all be much happier.